Okay, I am so new to *this* sort of thing, not just the gay thing but the 'liking-someone-too-much-thing' I'm posting here as I have no one I can really ask/talk to about these things. I'm not even sure where to start so I suppose I'll just tell the story in as few words as I can. - I am publicly straight and privately I've been attracted to girls, to this one girl in particular (Ella, who is publicly bi) but I only really noticed when I started getting romantic feelings for her. (Though sidenote: She is incredible, not the typical image of a magazine 'beauty' but in my eyes she is gorgeous. Her insane personality is what's- I can't really describe it without coming off sort-of insincere so. I like her. that's it.) - I became quite good friends with Ella and that's when I started to fall for her (noticing that I did so came afterwards) - Ella obviously had no idea about my feelings. - Over the course of months of me trying to figure these feelings it's revealed Ella has been dating my in-closet (and currently still) friend Jess. Cue heartbreak. - I love both Ella and Jess, I want to remain friends and I think the feelings are starting to fade but once I think they've subsided they just flame right up again if Ella and I spend any long length of time together, just hanging out even. - There are also feelings of regret that I missed the boat, so to speak, with Ella seeing as I was never out. I know I could never bring up these feelings with her because a) no point (She and Jess are the most solid couple I've ever seen) and b) potential friendship ruiner. How do I get rid of these feelings/wait for them to go away (it's been about a year going strong now) while maintaining my friendship with Ella? I used to see her everyday but it's much less frequent now university has begun. It's a fantastic friendship I don't want to lose but I also need to learn how to toe the line between friend behaviour and 'I-like-you-too-much' slightly-line-crossing-behaviour?