Together on/off for 6 years, split now for 4

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by Nothersanymore, Nov 15, 2013.

  1. Nothersanymore

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    What I don't understand is, why do I still miss her? I still think about her every day. I look at her pictures and I still hear her voice. Whenever I travel I think "Oh if she were here with me, this would be so much more fun". I'm in a relationship, she's in a relationship. We haven't spoken in over a year and before that it was almost 3 years that we hadn't talked. She contacted me the last time. She asked me if I missed her still. I think she just used me to end the relationship she was in at the time. I don't really know for sure. I do know that she lied heavily about quite a bit while we were talking or told me half truths to make her life seem much more positive and happy than it really was. I know that in my darkest moments of aching for her (and they happen still, why do they happen still?) if she were to pop out of nowhere and say to me "Come home, come away with me, lets run" I would. I think if it were at all feasible I would drop absolutely everything and go. Kids (who are almost out of the house anyway), relationship now, work, pets, home. I look at forever without her and its a crushing weight of painful nights and loneliness. What is wrong with me? How do I make this stop? I have been in counseling, I've written journals until my hands cramped, I'm in a new relationship and for all intents and outward purposes happy (the face the world sees). Our relationship together was oil and water but when it was good we were fire. We were unstoppable. The only people who could stop us were ourselves and stop us we did. Now we are like cats and dogs and we fight as soon as we start talking. I think because there is so much left unsaid, undone and unfinished and I have the feeling somewhere in her she feels the same way I do. Help me if you can. Anyone with similar experiences?
     
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  2. bittersweetlife9

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    Re: Together on/off for 6 years, split now fo...

    Runaway from her…cut her out and don't look back. My ex was the same way. 5 years together 8 years of friendship down the drain, but we cut off ties. Now she's married to some dude and I am so happy in my relationship. It took a lot to get where I am (She left me btw) but I wish I never met her actually looking back or never dated her at least. Yea we were awesome when we were awesome, but ughh the bad was bad! You have to remember that too… Just throw yourself into your relationship now, stop making excuses and finding flaws in everything and better yourself. Maybe she will be the one that got away, but it's easier to not deal with her drama maybe?

    I don't know, I just know what worked for me, so hope it helps ;)
     
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