Strap On Tips?

Discussion in 'General Advice' started by ThoughtsAnonymous, Feb 23, 2016.

  1. ThoughtsAnonymous

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    Hi all!
    It's been quite a long time since I've been on here, and now that I'm seeing a lovely woman, I've come here for some sage advice from the best! Neither of us has used a strap on, and aside from being nervous performance wise, I'm not sure what would be best to invest in. I've looked into the RodeOh and some other things, but are those the best hygienically, especially if the harness is being shared? Are there harnesses that are more "one size fits all" that any of you prefer? I'm a bit curvier than my partner in crime and need to keep this in mind.

    I've read that condoms should be used and changed for each person the strap on is being used on--will the lube damage certain dildos? I couldn't find what kind of base is used for condoms in the little internet research I have done so far.

    I'm also a college student, so the more affordable, the better! But of course, if you think that a certain product is worth the price, I will definitely consider it!
    Thanks so much!
    TA
     
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  2. lorienczhiu

    lorienczhiu Well-Known Member

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    Well, you can wash it in between uses. It's as hygenic as wearing each other's underwear if you share it without washing in between, because that is basically what it is. Generally, if you are concerned about fluid exchange, you should not be sharing toys in a single sitting (so to speak).

    Both your harness and your dildos should be washed thoroughly (soap and water) between uses, My wife and I don't use condoms (we've been each other's only partners for literally years, and have both been tested before that), but safer sex does mean changing a condom between use on different partners or between vaginal and anal use.

    Many harnesses are extremely adjustable, especially if they are the straps-and-buckles kind. If you and your partner are different sizes and want a fabric harness, I would recommend you each buying your own, because the fit of a fabric harness affects how much control you have over the dildo. RodeOH also come in a bunch of cute fabrics and styles online, so you can each choose what you think is sexiest. Plus, then you don't have to have a weird argument about who gets to keep it if you break up.

    For other harness advice, the folks at Good Vibes have you covered:
    http://www.goodvibes.com/display_ca...og70002_cat33831&show=ALLPRODUCTS&kbid=187482

    Buy unlubricated condoms if you can't find that info. Silicon-based lube will damange silicone dildos, so you want to use something water-based. It's good to have around for strap-on play (and all other sex) anyway.

    The really expensive thing about strap-ons is that they require buying the harness and the appropriate dildo(s) - and good ones are just expensive! I would read some reviews (Erika Moen at Oh Joy Sex Toy, as well as the good folks at Autostraddle) and figure out what shape/girth/features you're interested in. If you have a local sex toy shop, I'd go and check it out and ask questions. The first time I bought a dildo, the lady at the store asked me how many fingers I liked, and then asked my girlfriend how much she usually curled her fingers. It was a little embarrassing.... but it was definitely the right dildo.

    For advanced users, I also LOVE mydouble-ended dildo (designed by lesbians for lesbians). I have an earlier generation, and it's so great not to have to use a harness and to have it be thoroughly mutually satisfying.
     
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  3. ThoughtsAnonymous

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    This is a wonderful and thorough reply, thank you so much!! I will definitely check out those links and be more confident the next time I go to the sex stores around here :) I actually hadn't seen any of those sites you mentioned so this has been extremely helpful!
     
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