straight girls developing strong feelings for lesbian friends?

Discussion in 'General Advice' started by Luna1, Jan 11, 2016.

  1. Luna1

    Luna1 New Member

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    I need advice but my post will be a fairly long one. Any advice?
     
    #1
  2. Luna1

    Luna1 New Member

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    I am gay. My friend is straight but has developed feelings for me and we have been intimate already several times.

    I need advice.
     
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    Last edited: Jan 11, 2016
  3. lorienczhiu

    lorienczhiu Well-Known Member

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    Hah! My advice on this one, pretty much no matter the length of your story, is:

    1) Hooking up with straight girls is (typically) an exercise in frustration, unclear boundaries, and ultimate heartbreak. Do not advise.
    2) There is always someone who says "but it worked for me!" Okay. It works out when said straight girls are able to look honestly at themselves and their desires, and when they prioritize behaving like responsible loving people over their own gratification/need to be straight. (That's a pretty high bar; usually it doesn't work out.)
    3) No matter how much you like this friend, people only do what they're ready to do (be out, start relationships, be honest, exercise self control). You should decide what your boundaries are and enforce them, because you cannot make her do anything that she is not ready to or doesn't want to do.
     
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    rainydaze likes this.
  4. Eloise

    Eloise Well-Known Member

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    For starters, if you and your friend have hooked up then she isn't straight. Just because someone has only had straight experiences thus far it doesn't mean they're straight if they then have a same sex relationship. She's at the very least bi. Or, she might be a lesbian who is just now coming to terms with it.

    What do you need advice on?
     
    #4

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