Straight best friend initiates sex with gay best friend

Discussion in 'Advice (Dear AE...)' started by Butch19, Aug 3, 2018.

  1. Butch19

    Butch19 New Member

    Aug 3, 2018
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    Ok, so I seriously need some help because I am super confused. By the way I’m a lesbian.
    So one night me and my best friend were sleeping on the couch cuddled up together. We’re not small girls so we had to get close. Anyway, I was behind her, rubbing her back like I do ever time we sleep in the same bed or whatever because it helps her sleep. So I was rubbing her back and all of a sudden she kind of turns on her side to where I’m rubbing her stomach. I had never done that before so I was pretty confused but didn’t think anything of it. Well after a little bit of me rubbing her stomach she starts grinding on me. I thought I was just imagining it because it was super late and I was half asleep but then I realize it really was happening. Next thing I know she guides my hand towards her boob. And at that point I knew she wanted more. I was totally shocked because I always had a thing for her and of course fantasized about doing something like this with her but never thought in a million years it would happen. I’m also a virgin so of course I didn’t know what the hell I was doing. Well things got heated and we had sex. Not just once, but three times that day. It honestly wasn’t awkward after each time either. And because she is straight, I asked her why she was doing this now and why with me? She just said don’t ask questions. And she still hasn’t given me any answers either. This was 3 days ago and I really don’t know why she started this and why with me, now. So if y’all have any advice or theories on why the hell this is happening that would be great.
  2. greylin

    greylin Well-Known Member

    Jul 4, 2013
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    She doesn't know the answers to your questions. Or maybe she knows but feels too selfish to voice that she wanted to hook up with a friend with no strings attached.

    If you want something more intimate and hope to develop it into the type of romance you want it to be then you could try romancing her. Tell her what YOU want. Do you want dinner and a movie, say so. If sex and intimacy is always a bundle for you and she wanted just sex, then it will not work out for you very long before you'd have to quit her.

    Another observation I have is I wonder how she'd said, "Don't ask questions." Was that a cheeky, funny way she said it? Or was it in a way where she holds all the cards. Cause, that is a pretty uppity thing to say to someone you just had sex with.
    Last edited: Aug 6, 2018
    Nancy likes this.
  3. Spygirl

    Spygirl Well-Known Member

    Jul 2, 2013
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    I see this as a crime of opportunity. You were there and she used you. If she can't talk to you about what she wants from you, then chances are you don't want to hear the answers to your questions. She just doesn't have the guts to tell you the truth, because she probably thinks you want more from her than she's willing or able to give.

    And maybe I'm wrong -- maybe she wants something more from you -- but unless and until she's willing to talk about this "thing" between you, then you cannot make assumptions.

    If you're such good friends, you deserve to know whether this night was a one-off or if she's genuinely interested in you beyond friendship. She's disrespecting your friendship if she won't talk to you about it.
    Nancy and greylin like this.

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