Should I still Dance with her?

Discussion in 'General Advice' started by Erica James, Jun 10, 2015.

  1. Erica James

    Erica James New Member

    Jun 10, 2015
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    Hello Everyone,

    Alright, so I met this really cute girl who is into kpop (I’m into kpop!!) and she is a dancer for kpop cover dance contests. Well, her dancer sprained his ankle and she needed a new partner to dance with her for the kpop cover dance contest as she already signed up to dance a duo. Well, I sort of suggested myself as I like kpop and can follow choreography well. She agreed immediately.

    Anyway, well I have a crush on this girl and feel nervous around her. I was talking to my [online] friend about it and she suggested that I tell her how I feel since that is the only way to ease the nervousness I have around her. Well I stupidly I did that and sat her down and told her that I like girls and that I have a bit of a crush on her. She told me that she was straight and feels flatter but she wants to just remain friends. I don’t know why but my whole heart sank and I felt so depressed ever since she told me this. I mean, my depression comes and goes but I just felt like I wanted to mope in my room all day.

    The worst part is that I feel even more awkward around her now! The dance we are doing is sensual and there is a lot of touching going on in it. (Like I have to place my hand on her butt and she wears like a really figure hugging red dress) I just feel weird and uncomfortable doing this dance with her. I feel like a young 12 year old boy who just hit puberty and just now discovered the world of women, except that I am 26, beyond puberty, and has long discovered the world of women.

    At this point I don’t think I can even be friends with her this whole situation is so distracting. She tries on different outfits for me to see which one she should wear after the contest is over, etc. and I nearly pass out whenever she wears something I find particularly appealing on her (she even tried on a school girl outfit where the shirt was styled like a crop top and I’m like “Really fate! Really!”)

    What should I do? I want to quit dancing as her partner but this means a lot to her and she has so much stress and hurt going on in her life that I don’t want to add to it.

    How should I handle this?

    Thanks Everyone!!
  2. Just Me

    Just Me Well-Known Member

    Jul 4, 2013
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    I think you should finish the dance with her. Then if you still feel the same way about her when it's all over, you can distance yourself from her. I know it sucks having to hang around a crush after being rejected, but you told her you would step in and dance for her. As a friend to her, and as a decent human, you should at least honor that. And hey, at least she's not being mean about you being gay! She's not creeped out and pushing you away whenever you dance with her like a lot of women would after that situation. It's not her fault, don't quit, it would be selfish.
    greylin likes this.
  3. _mirage_

    _mirage_ Well-Known Member

    Aug 14, 2013
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    HI OMG I LOVE KPOP SO MUCH! What song are you covering?
    Anyway, I would recommend that you continue and complete the dance with her! So, what? She doesn't like you back. Sure, awkward, and sad for you, but you gave her your word as a friend that you would step in for her partner. I think you should follow through and try to enjoy yourself! Yeah, she' straight, but hey, you can still have fun performing, doing a stellar job, and dancing with a cute girl in a damn sexy outfit. Absolutely nothing wrong with that. Push that awkwardness aside and remember that she is still the same person as before. Obviously, she's not creeped out by your confession, so I would think that you two could still be fairly comfortable around each other despite the provocative dance. Just me (above) said a good point: if you still feel strongly about her after the dance, you can distance yourself to get over your crush. You surely don't have to dance with her again either. You can do it! :)
    greylin and Just Me like this.
  4. Eloise

    Eloise Well-Known Member

    Jul 26, 2013
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    Don't be one of those jerks who decides that if a girl isn't interested they're going to turn their back and end the friendship. Your dance will porobably be really hot because you like her. Try to remain friends so everyone will know you are a really cool person. She may have a friend she could introduce you to.
    TADinUS and greylin like this.
  5. TADinUS

    TADinUS Well-Known Member

    Jan 25, 2014
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    I know its late, but I want to chime in with Eloise.
    Leave good impressions with people, have good friendships. Besides the crush issue, you must of had fun anyway.
    I've been introduced to people because of such connections. And I've made referrals myself. I'm always on the lookout for a woman for a friend of mine... she's cool but had many broken hearts.

    Oh, down with Kpop! JPOP RULES!
    greylin likes this.

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