Share your bearding story

Discussion in 'Coming Out' started by xSkylar, Aug 23, 2015.

  1. xSkylar

    xSkylar New Member

    Apr 12, 2015
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    For those who aren't familiar with the term 'bearding', it's when you're a closeted gay but you date someone of the opposite sex so that friends and family won't think you're gay.

    I'm wondering how common it is for people to do this. Have you ever bearded? Did it work (throw people's suspicions off)?

    I was in a relationship with a guy for 6 months, but it wasn't intentionally to beard... I just thought that I needed to be with a guy to finally have feelings for them (dumb, I know). Obviously, the feelings were never there and I felt bad for stringing him along so I ended it. All my friends know about the relationship and they all assume I am 100% straight just because I was with a guy, (because bisexuality isn't an option to most people?!). My parents didn't know about the relationship, so they probably have some suspicions. I hate visiting my extended family because they always ask if I have a boyfriend and when I'm going to get one. I'm still not out yet, so I sometimes get devious ideas of dating the guys that are interested in me just for the sake of bearding. But I don't really want to do that because it's actually quite mean to the poor guy!

    TLDR; share your bearding story for lols because I really need them D;
  2. Wild Orchid

    Wild Orchid Member

    Nov 29, 2013
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    When I was dating a male (I was never in love with him, which confirmed how much more I like women), it wasn't for bearding, but more for the experience. We were/are really good friends still to this day. I will say, it isn't good to string them along, as I broke it off with him about 5 years ago and he still is in love with me. At times it puts a strain on our really good friendship because he looks at me as more than a friend, and I feel horrible about it.
  3. lorienczhiu

    lorienczhiu Well-Known Member

    Jul 18, 2013
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    I "dated" a (then-male) friend for the purposes of a spanish exchange in high school. The religious school we were visiting didn't seem like the best place to talk about my girlfriend, and my host kept trying to set me up with her boyfriend's friends. My friend similarly didn't want to be set up with girls, so it worked out.

    Sixteen years later, my "beard" has come out as a transgender woman, and she is confident and sexy! So maybe it would have worked out in the end...
    Gentry and Bluenote like this.
  4. Gentry

    Gentry Active Member

    Dec 9, 2014
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    I dated an attractive guy in college because I thought it could make me straight. I ended up our relationship in just two weeks because "I have to focus on studying". Almost a year later, we both fell inlove hard, at the same time, for the same woman. To make the long story short, I got the girl. :cool: :oops:

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