Outing yourself

Discussion in 'Advice (Dear AE...)' started by Whitney20, Jun 24, 2014.

  1. Whitney20

    Whitney20 Member

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    Hi AE, I have a huge problem. I'm a 20 year old lesbian, I have accepted it and am becoming more comfortable with it. I recently made a stupid post on Instagram basically outing myself. My brother saw it and showed my mom, so now I'm outed. I haven't talked to them since because I simply can't, I have all this anxiety inside and can't stop thinking about what they're going to say. I don't know what to do or say. Do I just go home and face it?
     
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  2. TLM327

    TLM327 Member

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    Hi there Whitney. First of all, the next time you see your brother, throw your shoe at him for me and tell him that outing people is so not cool. Second, I hate to say this, but there is only one way to find out what your family is actually going to say, and that is for you to go talk to them. If you need a few days to wrap your head around the situation, that's fine. Take your time. A few days to think may be good for your mom as well. If she's calling/texting you just make sure you let her know that you're not in a ditch somewhere.
    The anxiety is from not knowing. They may not be supportive or they may be angry (and there is always that possibility), but there is also the possibility that they've already decorated the house in unicorns and rainbows and you're missing out on it (ok that's less likely, but you get what I mean). Either way, there is only one way to find out. I sympathize with you, I'm not out to most of my family either. The first family member I came out to was my brother (ironic huh?) and I was an emotional wreck. It's ok to not know what to say, I planned this conversation out 50 different ways and I don't think I used any of them. Nonetheless, you staying away and avoiding the conversation isn't going to take away the fact that they know.
     
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