Online Dating After the 1st date

Discussion in 'Does She Like Me?' started by LezbeConfused, Jan 16, 2015.

  1. LezbeConfused

    LezbeConfused New Member

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    So I went out on a date with a girl I met on an online dating site. We met for drinks and it ended up being a great date, we hit it off really well and spent over 2 hours chatting before it got really late and I drove her home. We kissed and she said she had a great time and we should do it again. So next day she sends me a text 9am saying she had a great time and lets do it again. I reply saying I had a nice time too and if she is free the upcoming Sat. she replies she is out of town but asks maybe next week which I say ok.Next week comes and I text her asking if she wants to have dinner. She replies she got swamped with work and asks if I'm around next week (no mention of the weekend)

    Is she still interested or she changed her mind and is just trying to see if I get tired and go away? I know she does have a very busy work and is putting some crazy hours in but still we all stop at sometime right? Should I still pursue this or let t go? We really did hit it off very well and I'm attracted to her and she gave me every possible indication she liked me and wanted to see me again as she said so more than once, so I'm confused. What gives?
     
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  2. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member

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    If she wasn't interested she wouldn't reply. She's suggested meeting up at a later date because she's been swamped at work. Don't fret too much and give her a chance, agree to meeting up and see how it goes.
     
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  3. aussie_gabby

    aussie_gabby Well-Known Member

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    It sounds like she's interested but has a busy life. Which can be hard to date someone so busy.

    I've been both the person trying to date someone with a hectic work life and another the person with a lot on their plate.

    I'd say relax a bit, if she's a busy person let her come to you or work around your schedule.

    Maybe after another date or two she'll be trying to make as much time as possible to see you!
     
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  4. iskra

    iskra Member

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    Hi. Don't give up. She seems to be interested in you. Maby she is just busy, and thats it. Give her a chance. ;)
     
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  5. Kaiden

    Kaiden Well-Known Member

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    You should appear at her window, either is at her workplace, classroom or home, as a cheerleader "you go tiger, you can finish this job!/study!/poop" - if the bathroom has a window of course. to encourage her. and she will have time for you then ;)
     
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  6. Bluenote

    Bluenote Well-Known Member

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    Don't over react on a small sample size. It can be hard to tell if someone likes you, is just busy, or is giving you the brush off.

    It is normal for someone to stay to "weekday" dates at first. Maybe she has weekend plans - work, friends, family, clubs or sports she is part of. Likely she doesn't feel like she has to justify to you 'well, I can't meet Saturday, because I have Frostbite Club that day.'

    Some people get crushes really quickly, other people take more time. You can't judge if someone else's timeline doesn't match yours (or what you want them to be on). To a certain extent, you have to go with the flow.

    You have to give it some time and see over the course of a few weeks / months how things evolve.
     
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  7. sakatekka

    sakatekka New Member

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    I think if you do chat online or text each other then she's interested, just busy. But if you just invite her and she always postpones the meeting then, maybe, something has changed in her feelings and she just does not want to disappoint you.
     
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  8. LezbeConfused

    LezbeConfused New Member

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    Okay so just for the fun of it here is an update of what happened next. The following week I sent her a text asking how her week was going she ignored that. So I figure she is not interested but my friend convinces me to pursue her further so I come up with a funny clever text asking her to dinner and she accepts saying dinner sounds fun but can I confirm tomorrow so I say yeah no prob. Tomorrow comes and I don't hear from her. I don't hear from her the following day as well and that's when we are set to go to dinner... so finally at 5pm I text her asking if dinner is still on and she replies she got stuck at work. So I just text ok too bad. That weekend I send her another funny clever text mocking our scheduling problems saying she can let me know when she is free and we'll set something up. She ignores that too.

    So now I'm done. I give up, she is clearly not that interested what I don't understand is why keep leading me on.
     
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  9. aussie_gabby

    aussie_gabby Well-Known Member

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    Sorry to hear that. It's a good idea to let it go now, find someone who has the time and want to go out and get to know you.

    I wish i could tell you why girls lead people on when they have no intention of really wanting to even try and go out. She may genuinely be a busy person but to not have the courtesy to let you know she can't make it, well some strong swear words come to mind.

    Unfortunately, there are some girls out there who just like to lead people on or keep you around mainly for the ego of it all. And i say girls, because i like to think women don't pull this s**t!

    \
     
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  10. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member

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    Agree with @aussie_gabby, leave this experience behind and move on. Be thankful that this flakey girl did this after 1st date and not later on down the line.
     
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  11. Spygirl

    Spygirl Well-Known Member

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    She doesn't have the balls to be honest to say that she's not interested in you that way. Her actions are speaking quite loudly.

    Her loss -- not yours. Chalk it up to a good date and move on from it. Devote your time to someone that reciprocates.
     
    #11
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  12. KarmaMac

    KarmaMac New Member

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    This situation is eerily familiar to what I've been going through. Same situation, first date was great. We really clicked she kissed me at the end. Next day I texted her saying I had a great time and wanting to see if she'd be up for going out again the next week. She said she was down then blew me off blaming it on work. It takes her days to respond, if she responds at all. I told her I'd leave her alone if she was no longer interested, but she swore she had a great time and that she would be up for going out again. What ended up happening with your situation? This girl and her games are driving me nuts, but not quite ready to give up yet.
     
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