Is it over?

Discussion in 'Does She Like Me?' started by karin000aoi, Jan 24, 2015.

  1. karin000aoi

    karin000aoi Member

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    #1
    Last edited: Jun 11, 2015
  2. Bluenote

    Bluenote Well-Known Member

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    I think you haven't given us very much information. You probably blew it. Pretending it didn't happen likely won't help.
     
    #2
    Just Me likes this.
  3. Kaiden

    Kaiden Well-Known Member

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    forget about her. if people run away from someone who does or say stupid things when is drunk, then they are no fun. This kind of people are scared or feel creep even at the sound of an ugly leaf falling. i hope you cursed her at least, to give her real reasons :))
     
    #3
  4. Bluenote

    Bluenote Well-Known Member

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    It's still a little hard to tell what happened. From what you've said, it seems like what happened is - you know this girl and occasionally hung out with her. You felt some vibe and connection, but you guys had never gotten to the point of kissing / dating, whatever, it was just a vibe.

    Then you wound up together and there was a bunch of drinking. You got pretty drunk. And now when you see her, the vibe is gone.

    It does sound like it is over. You could try talking to her and saying "hey, that a-hole at the party, that wasn't me, that won't happen again." But - she probably won't believe you anyhow. And if you like to party, and she doesn't like that scene - you guys won't really work together anyhow.

    I think 3 possible things happened.
    1) You said or did some stuff that was rude / gross when you were drunk and that put her off
    2) Just the fact that you got so drunk put her off
    3) both 1 and 2

    Dating wise, lots of people set limits about what they will deal with and what they won't. "I don't want a party girl," "pot is OK, but no hard drugs," etc... If this girl refuses to date someone who drinks, or who gets wound up when they are drunk, then you guys just aren't a good fit.

    When I was in college, I had a gf who was really into drugs. She got addicted to pills after she got hurt in a car accident. I really loved her and she was an awesome person. But I couldn't deal with - how very shitty it is to watch someone be an addict. And how quickly she spiraled from pills to street drugs to mixing it all and adding tons of alcohol, too.

    After her, I set a hard line and wouldn't date / be close friends with anyone who was heavy into anything - booze, pills, whatever. Of course, this was college, so I had to put distance between myself and a number of my friends who were really into drinking and partying. I also went out on a few dates with this amazingly hot girl, found out she was into hard drugs and broke it off with her. Yeah, she was hot as hell and really cool to boot, but I was not messing with that situation again.

    I don't know what "vibe girl's" deal is. But there is a pretty good chance that she is like me, in that she has some limits and won't date someone who drinks a lot, or whatever. So she saw you get pretty drunk and that's it - deal breaker for her.

    If you really like partying (which is your prerogative), then a girl like her isn't for you. If you could go either way on partying, but really want to get the girl - talk before you drink. Just talk to a girl and see 'hey do, you drink, do you like to go to parties.' And if she says "no, I hate seeing people all effed up," make a note of it and don't get really drunk around her.

    This is all part of learning, I guess. Better luck next time.
     
    #4
    Emm likes this.
  5. Spygirl

    Spygirl Well-Known Member

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    If you're going to let yourself get that out of control when you're trying to make a good impression on someone you just met...that says a lot. Granted, we all do stupid things....but it seems like you just met this girl and your drunken episode happened in the same night (or very close to when you actually just met). That would be a major turn off for me as well.

    It's not about the getting stupid drunk...it's when you chose to do it. She doesn't know that you're "not like this" as you claim to be. You showed that you didn't know your limits...trust me, I meet someone I like and I'm not going to get blitzed..same reason that I won't get blitzed at a social function or with colleagues. She's going to expect this behavior from you now because it's what you've demonstrated...if she's not responding to you, then it means she's just not that into you. Move on.
     
    #5

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