In love without signs that her like me

Discussion in 'Does She Like Me?' started by Reny, Feb 7, 2020.

  1. Reny

    Reny New Member

    Dec 16, 2019
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    Hello girls, I am colombian and I would like your help since I am in love with a woman who does not know if she is heterosexual, bisexual or lesbian. She is 50 years old and I am 40, we are not close and I see her only a couple of times a year when she visits the office. I have known her for 7 years but since 5 years ago started my attraction to her and I spent time imagining a life by her side. She is strong and very hermetic, so nobody knows anything about her life, only that she is single and has no children.

    I'm looking for signs that tell me that she likes me but I don't have any. Once I sent her an email signing with my nickname and one day she called me with that nickname, I found it very strange that she remembered because she had been sending the mail about 6 months ago. Once she told me that she remembered that I didn't like to gain weight and I really don't remember telling her, although she has an overweight trauma and maybe that's why she remembered. On another occasion when I was going to enter her office I saw her looking me up and down, I felt her look very strong, and I thought it was my imagination, but at some point in the talk she told me she liked my boots, so really she scanned me when I entered the office. That same day I made a joke and she laughed holding her gaze for a few seconds. I also told her that I would like her to support me to solve some work doubts that I had and her face lit up and with a smile she said yes. All the meetings we have had last approximately 20 minutes and the last meeting we had lasted about an hour, we were seeing the same issues over and over again, I even came to think that we were extending the meeting on purpose. Finally, before saying goodbye, she told me in a mellow tone that I should quit smoking because it was bad for my health and at that moment I wanted to go crazy because I felt she cared about me!

    Out of these situations I have no more signs that she likes me and I don't know what to think, if I send her an email telling her that I like her she may be frightened and think that I am harassing her or maybe she tells me that I misunderstood everything and she likes men. I have her whatsapp but because a co-worker gave it to me, she has not given anyone her phone number. She doesn't have Facebook or Instagram, nothing that can help me know more about her.
    Writer23 likes this.
  2. Coffee Addict

    Coffee Addict Well-Known Member

    Jul 23, 2013
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    I’m not sure if you are currently in Colombia or not, but it would make a difference in terms of interactions and course of action. However, based on your post it is difficult to tell whether she is interested more than a friendly way.
    Regardless, I think that it’s prudent to know her better before saying anything, so I would suggest to email her and ask if should would like to meet to have some coffee or something.

    Try to find a casual outing to invite her and get to talk more, and get to know her better outside the office.

    Good luck.
  3. Writer23

    Writer23 Well-Known Member

    Jul 14, 2018
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    At 50 years old, she has some inkling as to rather or not she is heterosexual, bisexual or lesbian. DO NOT send her a work email telling her that you like her because she is your colleague and if you are wrong, your action could result in you being reprimanded or terminated.

    In all truth, to me, it seems as if she is just being a friendly colleague. Nevertheless, it is very possible that there is some validity to what you feel, but what if it is all in your head. What if… and trust me I’ve been here …an innocent crush on your part morphed into something so much more IN YOUR HEAD.

    In this way, unless she does something definitive, do nothing. Let her make the first move, if there is something.

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