I need your advice!

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by AnnBennett, Jun 4, 2015.

  1. AnnBennett

    AnnBennett New Member

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    My girlfriend cheated on me, she told me about that. I has forgiven her, but I can't trust her now. What to do? How to know that she is not cheating on me now?
     
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  2. greylin

    greylin Well-Known Member

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    It is very nice of you to have forgiven her but forgiveness does not equal trust. She has destroyed the innocence of your relationship and has broken something that is very difficult to re-establish. She has to do most of the heavy lifting to gain it back and you have the most difficult task of communicating from a place of wanting to make it work but you are still angry maybe and suspicious definitely. Try doing some positive reinforcement on when she is opening up to you and being honest by telling her how much you like it.

    Sometimes some people just can't be with only one person and would lie to get what they want. This would be a fatal case for your relationship because I don't think you can put up with it. That you need to assess for yourself when your communication with her improves. Practice safer sex, and good luck, I hope it works out for you.
     
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    Last edited: Jun 8, 2015
    Spygirl likes this.
  3. Spygirl

    Spygirl Well-Known Member

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    There's no excuse for cheating. However, cheating can also be a symptom of other problems in a relationship -- that is, when issues are ignored, people act out in ways that are pretty much unforgivable. You need to take a look at not only the cheating ...but what prompted it? Look at your relationship as a whole (how long have you been together?) and begin to discern where the problems began, with whom, and when the cheating occurred. A lot of times both people own some of the fault when relationships break down.

    Once trust is broken, it can be incredibly difficult and sometimes impossible to get back. Perhaps you should try counseling if you believe your relationship is worth saving. For me...I'm not sure I could trust again -- that thought would always be in the back of my head.
     
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