How to Get Over My Crush?

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by sundancer, Jun 4, 2015.

  1. sundancer

    sundancer Well-Known Member

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    Over the past 6 months I've known this lesbian who I now have a massive crush on. The more that I hang out with her, the more that I feel my attraction grow towards her. I have attempted to objectively remind myself all the bad things about her that I wouldn't want as a potential gf whilst keeping in mind that I still wish to be her friend. I met up with her last week - just the two of us - and I didn't have any feelings for her. That was a win. The next day we went out with our friends. Somewhere along the line there was this moment where I think she liked me more than a friend but I ignored it.

    I know this sounds ridiculous because it feels like I should move ahead and see where it goes but I don't want to. How do I get over this crush apart from not hanging out with her as often??
     
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  2. Bluenote

    Bluenote Well-Known Member

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    Why don't you want to try and see where things go with her?
     
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  3. sundancer

    sundancer Well-Known Member

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    The reason why I don't want to cross the line is because she's good as a friend but there are a number of her traits that I know would end up being a disaster for me/us if we end up together. I guess the situation is kind of like when you're attracted to the bad boy/girl who is ok as a friend but you know it'll bad for you in the end if you get together.
     
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  4. Bluenote

    Bluenote Well-Known Member

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    That makes sense.

    The truth is, you can't 'get over' a crush. All you can do is not act on it and not feed it. And stay busy doing other stuff.

    It might help you to have some time apart from her, or to cut down how much time you spend together. It would also help to try and stay busy doing stuff that doesn't involve her. You could do things like go to lesbian meet ups, go out dancing. But you could also spend more time staying busy with other activities, like any clubs or groups you are involved in. None of this will make your attraction go away, but it will keep you busy and keep you from dwelling on it.

    Personally, I think it is good that you see things won't work out and have the self control not to go there. I know it is painful, but in the long run it is better.
     
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    greylin likes this.
  5. sundancer

    sundancer Well-Known Member

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    Thanks. This sounds really strange but ever since I posted up on here the crush has kind of disappeared. I saw her yesterday and she looked good... but other than that I had no feelings whatsoever. lol...
     
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  6. Thatbeautifulartist

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    I wish I knew how to get over a crush :/ That's just something I can't seem to do. Luckily my latest crush is now My girlfriend.
     
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