So its been a while since I posted, I've been in a relationship for about 9 months now and things have been okay, not the best, but not horrible either. I'm happy.. but I feel like she isn't. If you have read my previous posts you know, she says I never share my feelings with her and I never just want to hold her hand and all this stuff that I guess she "needs".. I'm honestly not an overly affectionate person, or at least I'm not right now. I have been known to be that way in other relationships, but before her I hadn't been in one in over 2 years. We've had small arguments because she feels like I don't care, etc.. I am divorced, no children, and I'm 25.. trying to get my career stable. Which in this economy is a lot of work. She is older than me almost by 10 years. I actually thought her being older meant that we would be perfect because I have been through a lot of things in my past already that has made me more mature than most my age and she had been in a 6 year relationship before me so I thought she knew what I meant by take it slow and not push anything when we agreed to start dating. She told me she loved me after about 3 months I think, for me, that's fast. The last girl that I fell in love with, I didn't really realize or tell her until almost a year after we met. And that girl, was completely different. Honestly. I'm getting frustrated. I am happy, but I feel that I could be happier. Is that selfish of me? I'm not mean to her and she isn't mean to me, I just am not sure we are in the same places in our lives. She constantly makes comments about how I don't walk around naked, or ever want to have sex, or kiss her randomly or hold her hand, which makes me pull further and further into myself. I've sat her down before and tried to talk to her, but we always end up at this same talk every month it seems. I went through a lot about 2 months after we started dating, my best friend of 3 years whom was my go to person for everything walked out of my life without a word, and still to this day hasn't said a thing to me, and it really hurt me. I since then have had building social anxiety, I don't go out anymore at all like I used to. My social life has taken a complete plunge. Here lately I've been trying to pick it back up with old friends I haven't seen in a while who are parents now and such, but I'm still figuring myself out I guess. I don't know how to explain it, but honestly its as if I lost myself, and I'm having to figure everything out again and go a new route.. Anyway.. enough of me jabbering on. Point is.. I don't know what to do. So any advice? I've tried talking to her, but it always seems to creep its way back at least every month. I don't really want to break up, but I would like to not have so much pressure. And she in no way sees that she pressures me, says she doesn't want me to feel that way, that she is simply just explaining her feelings. It's like we argue and nothing changes, constantly.