Heartache

Discussion in 'Does She Like Me?' started by LoveGurl, Nov 18, 2019.

  1. LoveGurl

    LoveGurl Member

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    So, I've been crushing really hard on this woman for almost 2 months now. In the beginning I didn't look at her in any other way then I do my friends who a girls but one day it all changed.

    We'd been talking, having fun, joking and I had noticed she'd been around me a lot and I could FEEL her looking at me, also noticed it. But at that time I had zero interest in her. Then that day came when it was as if someone shot me with a dart in my heart and I fell in love with this woman and I haven't been able to function normal around her since.

    At first I had some fun with it, had her come and help me even if I didn't need it, talking to her about nothing just so she could stay. And I began to look at her, really look, checking her out. I had fun with it until one day, she sat across the room and as I was going to look at her I saw her looking straight at me. It freaked me out so I looked down, looked back - she kept staring me in the eyes, I looked down again and then at her once more and she was still looking at me. Then I couldn't handle it so I stopped looking.

    Now I begin avoiding her a bit, we still talk but not as much. But I continue checking her out. When she's around she's always goofing around, talking extra loud.

    For a few days we meet eyes in the break room, she looks at me and I her, both of us never really smile only stare, haha. Now I think geez what to do to know if she's gay. So one day, she walks in, I notice her walking in the room, scans the room and stops at me, but I don't look at her. But I notice her standing still so I look and she is standing there staring me straight in the eyes. I hold her gaze in what feels like forever and then I check her out - down and up - and hold her gaze again. She never breaks eye contact so I break it and I look away but notice her standing there for a few more seconds then walk away.

    This confuses me even more, I felt I was very clear about checking her out, maybe I annoyed her.... dont know. For a more couple of days we look at each other in the break room but now I'm thinking maybe I am pissing her off, haha. So I avoid her even more but my feelings for her at this point is even stronger, I cant form words around her and my heart beats so freakishly fast.

    Another day we look at each other and she tells a friend something so he moves a bit so the view between us is very clear, as she looks at me she leans into one of her other friends and whispers something and her friend looks at me. She keeps looking at me and now I feel wtf is she saying something about me to her friends, probably that I'm weird.

    Now I barely look at her anymore, I glance over from time to time but not at all as I used to. But today and last week I noticed her looking at me again and listening to what I TRIED to whisper to one of my friends (because she repeated it) and today she said something that got me so sad - she's moving, I have less then two months with her and then she'll be gone :( Everyone was happy for er but I got relly really sad, so now I'm here at home just suffering in heartache.

    I just wanted to let some drama out.
    If anyone had the time to read all of this, wow, haha
     
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  2. greylin

    greylin Well-Known Member

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    Once upon a time, I met these 2 foreign exchange students in my country. They were just friends. Then the weekend before they had to leave for their respective countries, they realized they liked each other. So they spent a weekend loving each other till they had to go. It was before the internet and skype. It was youth, love without a future and messiness of breaking up with someone else. To these two, I would say, youth was never wasted on them.

    Not that it would work out for you that way, but why run away from your feelings? Tell her you haven’t had much time to be friends and you will miss her. Then ask her out and see where it goes. She says no then oh well. It would only be 2 months and the awkwardness would end when she leaves. One thing though, the staring then whispering to her friends thing seems kind of rude, or was I misinterpreting?
     
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  3. LoveGurl

    LoveGurl Member

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    It's easy to say these things "you can ask her out" or "tell her how you feel" but in reality it's not. Some weird things has happened and she's not acting at all how she used to with me. I don't really know what's up with that.

    I don't know what she whispered to her friends. It felt as if it might have been her whispering to the female friend "is that girl looking at me" and her friend looked at me and then answered her. But that is only me guessing. I don't think she said anything mean. But man, her friends NEVER looked at me before and now they do glance over at me from time to time so she has said something about me to her friends. They really didn't give a F about me before nor knew I even existed. (these are other friends of her)

    It can only be one of two things, either "i think that girl likes me" or "that girl is so weird". But I got myself to blame for that, I'm too much of a chicken to approach her at this point. It was much easier when she didn't know I was checking her out.
     
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  4. greylin

    greylin Well-Known Member

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    You can’t go back and have a do-over, but you can control your destiny from now on and listen to what your feelings are telling you. I know it is easy for me to say from my vantage and armchair, but the only thing to concern about the whispers is how rude that is and not what they maybe saying.
     
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  5. LoveGurl

    LoveGurl Member

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    True but today she was very friendly to me so idk. Everything is so frikkin confusing
     
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  6. greylin

    greylin Well-Known Member

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    Meeting people, forming a relationship is quite opportunistic, isn’t it? Observe other things than just her face, find out things that she likes with casual glances. If she likes something you like or know about, ask her about it. Do a lot of asking and listening. That can make things normal for your interactions.
     
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  7. LoveGurl

    LoveGurl Member

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    She is now very friendly once again. She confuses the hell outta me but at the same time I like it.
     
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  8. greylin

    greylin Well-Known Member

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    Hmm, two different things could be happening and the two do not exclude each other. 1. People who blow hot and cold are controlling the situation and that is how they want it. It is entertainment. 2. You may not be reading the situation correctly because your heart is drumming out of your chest and every pulse point when you are around her.

    Perhaps best to vent whatever you are observing?
     
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