Flirting

Discussion in 'Advice on Meeting Women' started by lynds126, Jul 3, 2013.

  1. lynds126

    lynds126 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 3, 2013
    Messages:
    598
    Likes Received:
    1
    Hey all, I've got a real problem. I'm new to the dating scene, my last girlfriend was in high school (7 yrs ago) and frankly, I cannot flirt lol. It's pretty embarrassing. My friend is always telling me that people are flirting with me and I'm just clueless. I can't seem to tell when a girl is just being nice/friendly, or if she's making a move. Here's an example:

    A couple years ago, I went to PointFest (STL alternative music concert). While I was in a crowd this girl pushed through the people behind me and we like did a double take when we saw each other. And she waved me closer and was like "You're short." (guilty) and I was like "You are too." (which she was as short as me). We spent the rest of the concert next to each other, looking out cause there were a lot of mosh pits. I mean, talking was minimal because it's a concert but we managed to get a few remarks in. After the concert, I wanted to go actually introduce myself but she was with another girl. So I'm not about to steal anyone's gf. But I told my friend this and she was like "SHE WAS FLIRTING WITH YOU!!! WHY DIDN"T YOU DO ANYTHING??" lol so if anyone has any advice, I'd really appreciate it =D
     
    #1
  2. La Toyia

    La Toyia Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 4, 2013
    Messages:
    45
    Likes Received:
    0
    To find out if someone is flirting with you, you have to read their body language. Common flirting signs that I look out for are fidgeting, excessive smiling, giving compliments in combination with other signs such as speaking slowly or quite fast. This is a sign of nervousness.
    To learn how to flirt you'll have to practise a lot. If you see someone you'd like to chat with, find an opening line and a reason to go over and talk with them, make eye contact, smile and also find something to compliment them on. This is usually a good conversation starter.
     
    #2
  3. lynds126

    lynds126 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 3, 2013
    Messages:
    598
    Likes Received:
    1
    hmm...interesting. So simple and yet I never thought of that lol. Well apparently I did it again. Yesterday I was at Michael's looking for a shade of marker and I had to walk past this girl. And I squeezed behind her and I was like "Excuse me," and she was like smiling at me and whatever. I felt like she was staring at me but of course, I do nothing because I'm dumb like that lol. My friend is like "That was a flirting moment right there." :shock: whoops. I'm gonna be single for the rest of my life lol I'm always afraid that I'm thinking they're flirting when they're just being friendly. And I'm not really sure if I wanna put myself out there like that. shrugs. Maybe I'm too uptight??
     
    #3
  4. Valium

    Valium Member

    Joined:
    Jul 9, 2013
    Messages:
    9
    Likes Received:
    0
    I think everybody struggles with identifying flirting sometimes. I'd say just go for it! Tell that cashier you've never seen before she's got a gorgeous smile, tell that stranger walking to the bus stop you think they have lovely eyes, tell people you think are beautiful that they're beautiful. Compliments are a good way to start a conversation, and you'll generally notice peoples' body language open up if they do want to initiate a conversation with you. Even if they're not interested, a compliment is a compliment, and you'd have made somebody's day, regardless! I've never found myself in a bad situation because I gave praise where I felt praise was deserved.

    I also find that a lot of people are deterred if somebody they're interested in came with another person they may (or may not!) be involved with. Just go up and introduce yourself! It's scary diving into a group of strangers, but there's no harm in making new friends. If they are actually with their girlfriend, etc. and they make a big deal out of it, that's their problem, you were only trying to be friendly.

    Keep practicing being brave! :)
     
    #4
  5. lynds126

    lynds126 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 3, 2013
    Messages:
    598
    Likes Received:
    1
    Wow.

    That was the most down to earth answer I've heard xD And I've asked a lot of people. That makes a lot of sense and sounds a lot more like the approach I'd be ok with. You sound super confident and chill about it lol. Very lucky. Thanks for the good advice!!
     
    #5

Share This Page