Curiosity for guys?

Discussion in 'General Advice' started by Love*Cali, Dec 30, 2013.

  1. Love*Cali

    Love*Cali Well-Known Member

    Aug 29, 2013
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    I've never been with a guy. I had a bf at 14 who I had been initially really into. In fact, he was the only boy I had ever had feelings for. But when he went in to kiss me once, I suddenly felt ill, pulled away and dumped him one week later. Apart from that, I have always been turned on sexually by guy parts [though, again, have never been with a guy because I never wanted the intimacy -kissing, hugging, etc].

    I've always loved women and have only imagined my future with women. I haven't noticed guys since that one at age 14.

    Recently, however, I began to feel like I wanted to hook up with a guy friend (just sexual). I figured it was because I was in that ovulating phase when I'm usually just.. wanting *it* a lot in general...But now, I'm wondering if I'm actually beginning to have some type of feelings for him. It's not with the same intensity that I have felt for girls. But I'm finding myself jealous, wanting his attention, and I'm finding that I do think about him at various times through the day. I don't know what it is. Maybe I just really want to be friends [with benefits]. He supposedly liked me in the past and I was far from the idea. Far. Far from it. I wanted nothing to do with him at all.... and his breath smelled. [Maybe I simply have missed the attention?]

    I feel more willing to flirt with guys in general lately and feel like I wouldn't mind one to cuddle. I am noticing a lot more guys who seem cute and cuddle-able.This is so different for me. I don't know if this is some momentary change in hormones? Through the past, I had always felt like hugging guys was like hugging rocks and I never cared much if they were thinking about me or what they were thinking about me.

    Have any of you ever begun to feel curious about guys like this? I don't seem to like them enough to be in a relationship with them...but obviously, there's something suddenly there and I'm very confused about it. And honestly, I would be afraid to try pursuing it. I'm 22. Thanks.
  2. greylin

    greylin Well-Known Member

    Jul 4, 2013
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    I have heard that it is common for women who generally like women to fantasize about men every once in a while. I can appreciate men and find them sweet and occasionally think about them sexually but it is very different than actually want to be in a relationship with them so I understand how you'd feel.

    If the feelings are strong enough, you can only really find out by acting on it. I have had things (long long ago) like I dated a guy and it was exciting and fun flirting up till a minute past in making out then I would lose all interest. It was the lack of connection or scent or something that really threw me. It was not a pleasant thing for me to find out and halt everything on the poor guy but I could not have known until it went that far. Perhaps you might be thinking about your friend because he is a good possibility that however things go you would feel safe with him. If you want to experiment with a friend I would be up front about it. Any involvement with people can get messy so it is good that you are cautious.

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