Cheating boyfriend

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by Paladze, Jun 4, 2015.

  1. Paladze

    Paladze New Member

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    My gay boyfriend started to communicate with his ex, I’m afraid to lose him and I’m afraid that he is cheated on me. I try to talk to him about it, but he dodges all my questions. How can I check him?
     
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  2. sela9

    sela9 Well-Known Member

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    If he can give you the answers to your questions then that sounds like he may be hiding something...Usually if you are worried about cheating, then it's because they most likely are....Sorry. But, speak to him calmy and ask him questions.
     
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  3. Paladze

    Paladze New Member

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    I talked to him about my worries. And we quarrelled.

    I know it is not right to spy on him. But this is the only way for me to be calm. I googled spying apps but there are plenty of them. And don't know what is really good. I believe I'm not the first who want to use such app and I will be thankfull for you advices
     
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  4. Ooohwhatprettystars

    Ooohwhatprettystars Well-Known Member

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    Well.. there are many things to consider. Just because one talks to their ex does not mean cheating automatically. How long has it been since they split? How long have you two been together? And has he ever talked to him before, after they broke things off, or is this the first time they've talked since splitting?

    While I completely understand being cautious, no amount of spying is going to make you feel any better. Even if you spy on him and find out its nothing, you will ultimately feel guilty knowing you were the one to actually betray his trust.

    My firm advice is to communicate, without communication relationships don't last long. I can assure you that if my girlfriend went behind my back and spied on me for any reason, she would then be my ex girlfriend. Relationships are about trust, if you can't trust the person you are with, then you should not be together. Its harsh, but its the truth, I learned the lesson the hard way before and it really isn't worth the stress to always have to worry what someone is doing if they refuse to communicate with you.

    If you have brought the subject up to him and he still refuses to acknowledge that you are uncomfortable and just want to know what is going on, then maybe its time to reconsider the relationship. However, when you approach the subject, make sure you are not approaching it with an accusatory or negative vibe. Allow him to see that you are sincerely just concerned and need him to put your mind at ease.
     
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  5. Paladze

    Paladze New Member

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    Thank you Ooohwhatprettystars but it is late. i used a spying app on my bf.
    Some days ago a person who had a similar situation advised me to use app and I installed it on my bf's phone.
    It is really stealthy and works good. It gives an opportunity to read his messages, see call history and see his location on google maps.
    I have found out that his ex tries to return him and my boyfriend answers his questions with big interest. Yesterday night he got a call from his ex. After work my bf visited him at his house and stayed there for 47 minutes. I packed all my belongings and when he came home I asked why he was so late - he lied to me he was at his mother's house. When I showed him where he was and all messages which he got from his ex, he said he was sorry.
    I do not want to get stabbed in the back and learn about it in a year or two
     
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    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 9, 2015
  6. Eloise

    Eloise Well-Known Member

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    What's the name of that app? I may want to use it sometime.
     
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  7. Harpy

    Harpy Well-Known Member

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    If he can PM it to you that would be great, but posting it not so much. I suspect this whole thread was probably spam for it seeing as I removed multiple references to it in one post.
     
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  8. Bluenote

    Bluenote Well-Known Member

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    Depending on where you live and how the app functions, it may be illegal. In some places gaining unauthorized access to someone else's device is a crime. Paying someone else (or an app) to do the hacking for you, doesn't usually protect you from legal responsibility. Cheating on someone isn't usually a crime, but hacking their device can be.
     
    #8
    Farore, Spygirl, Narley and 2 others like this.

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