Discussion in 'General Advice' started by Pi3, Dec 6, 2014.

  1. Pi3

    Pi3 Well-Known Member

    Jul 3, 2013
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    Probably I just want to lash out, but if I can get some advice on this topic would be appreciate... I have one sibling who is younger than me, and he is graduating from undergrad... He was doing well last year, and got himself involved in many activities... Then everything went down hill after he got rejected from scholarship, projects he applied for and some other minor stuff...

    now he doesn't want to go out (even though he says he wants to go to the beach, but he won't go out just the two of us)... he wants a job, but delays on finding it... He is going to apply for demonstrator job at uni, but he needs to choose supervisor first which he is also putting off... I got really mad at him this morning, because he was egar to go flee market with me last night...

    I know a road trip would be good for him, but I can't afford now... I am in between some jobs... I don't really know what to do...
  2. Just Me

    Just Me Well-Known Member

    Jul 4, 2013
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    Sounds like your brother's going through a bit of depression, fair enough behavior given your explanation of what's going on.

    It's totally frustrating watching your family when they're stuck in a rut. All you can do is support them the best you can and let them know you're there for them. It sounds like you're doing a good job.
  3. Spygirl

    Spygirl Well-Known Member

    Jul 2, 2013
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    I have a younger brother who's had a wayward life...and I've tried to help him time and time and time and time again. Parents divorced, so to get him out of the house, I took him in as a roommate when my other roommate moved out of state. What did he do? Move his girlfriend in (unbeknownst to me at the time), and ultimately I ended up paying for a lot of the rent and utilities -- though he always had money for alcohol. Flash forward and he's still pretty much in the same rut -- married and kids, but still dealing with his depression and other issues.

    The point is -- you can only do so much. It sucks to watch someone make mistakes but at some point he's gotta grow up and start to take responsibility for himself. If depression is an issue -- he needs to seek treatment. I've learned that the best way to be there for my brother is simply to back off -- and when he truly needs something, he'll be the one to ask me.

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