Age is but a number!

Discussion in 'General Advice' started by moveslikejagger, Oct 16, 2014.

  1. moveslikejagger

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    A 35 year old female crushing on a 22 year old female, weird strange or ok?
     
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  2. MizzLadyPants

    MizzLadyPants Well-Known Member

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    That's not exactly a huge age difference. Im 23, last year I dated someone 18years my senior lol.

    And right now one of my crushes is this super cute instructor at my college and she's like 30 or so. Of course she's my instructor lol- thats probably worse than an age difference lmao
     
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  3. moveslikejagger

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    22 year old straight girl. FML! :(
     
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  4. Cricket

    Cricket Well-Known Member

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    The straight part and your age is telling me that you need get over it, and fast. Hard truth.
     
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  5. Keep It Real

    Keep It Real Member

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    Not enough information to answer weird strange or not. How is it that you a 35 year old lesbian is crushing on a 22 year old straight woman?
     
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  6. moveslikejagger

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    We had been working together on a project for the past 6 months ridiculous timings 7am to midnight on a daily basis. Project ended feelings happened. Anyway never hid my sexuality from her she has known since the first month. She is very physically affectionate with me but i think that's in her nature. Bottom line project ended trying to keep a distance but its hard as we are in touch on a daily basis. Not being inappropriate from my end keeping it platonic or at least trying to.
     
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  7. Keep It Real

    Keep It Real Member

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    With the information you’ve stated, I’d say, if you can handle the maturity level differences - then the crush is fine. It’s only weird if you two think it’s weird. She’s an adult, if she wants to hang with you then have at it.
    I would be hesitant to start something more than hanging out. I’d be concerned about what we would have in common other than work.
    But then again, hanging out is how you find out what you have in common…
     
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  8. Coffee Addict

    Coffee Addict Well-Known Member

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    Two things here: first, age is just a number (as long as it is legal). Second, age difference aside, getting involved with a co-worker. There are plenty of great relationships with big age gaps. However, "big gap" is just another number.

    There are many implications of having (or wanting to have) a relationship with a co-worker. Assuming there is no conflict of interest, no power imbalance (that could be interpreted as harassment), and no office policy problem, the true issue here is that she is straight. Unfortunately, there is nothing to about her orientation.

    I understand that when people work closely together there is a camaraderie that allows them to grow closer. However, this does not mean that it is always romantic. In many cases, it is personal but not romantic, close in nature but different.

    I'd say, try to see your feelings for her from a distance and understand your attraction. What is attracting you to her? Is is the comforting feeling of companionship, and good conversation? a good friendship? is it infatuation for a idealized friend? What I am trying to say is that maybe it is the idea of someone like her that you like but not necessarily her. Perhaps if you understand the origin of your feelings it will help you relax about them and let her go (so to speak).

    Anyway, good luck to you :)

    --CA
     
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  9. pikatan2

    pikatan2 Well-Known Member

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    well age is really just a number... as a "product" from a 32 years age differences marriage my self, I can say it is only a number (AS LONG AS ITS LEGAL) but the straight part tho... now that is not legal :p lawl jk.. but if shes straight I would say its really a was of time....

    Remember this lesbian and bisexual girl out there...

    STRAIGHT GIRLS IS NOT A CHALLENGE! <3

    xx
     
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  10. moveslikejagger

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    So I told her that i was crushing on her..we are still friends..time to move on
     
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  11. moveslikejagger

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    she responded by hugging me and saying its not personal and that shes straight...
     
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  12. pikatan2

    pikatan2 Well-Known Member

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    well my parents are 32 years apart :D... so you're good to go man! as long as shes legal,,,, BUT I have to say tho the straight part might not be a good idea :D xx
     
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  13. sela9

    sela9 Well-Known Member

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    Well aside from saying move on from the straight girl I do want to add, I disagree- age is not just a number. I think age difference is fine, but 22 is young...You are probably at a stage where you want to settle down, get married, stay in more. Perhaps where I live is different from where you live, but I would say 22 year olds are still figuring themselves out, tend to go out more, not have their finances and career together.... My friends and I all say 25 and above is fair game...
     
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  14. Eloise

    Eloise Well-Known Member

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    Crushing is ok, but we don't always need to tell our crushes we have the hots for them. Keep some secrets to yourself. Eventually it will pass.
     
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  15. Emmarose

    Emmarose Active Member

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    Well Um - in my experience I would question her emotional age ?
    I have just come out of a 21yr age gap relationship and I would not recommend it -
    I always felt I was trying to be 'older' felt like I was living an older life - stopped living my life in some ways -
    I discovered their 'maturity was really just a number -
    I'm so glad to be out of it now
    22yrs - my 20s were about exploring life ( it still is about that ) and age appropriate is important I feel for our own growth -
    Sounds like u may be having doubts if it's appropriate and only u can decide that -
    My advice - don't :)
    All best wishes - life your young life and be 22 :)
     
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  16. Emmarose

    Emmarose Active Member

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    Oops just realised the writer is the older person - ah ok -
    No leave alone :)
    And she's straight ok def leave the girl alone - does she need boundaries ?
     
    #16

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