A whirlwind friendship that started on Tinder

Discussion in 'Does She Like Me?' started by loulainx3, Oct 15, 2015.

  1. loulainx3

    loulainx3 New Member

    Oct 15, 2015
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    Last edited: Oct 15, 2015
  2. Bluenote

    Bluenote Well-Known Member

    Jul 4, 2013
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    You can't make someone come out if they aren't ready. You can't make someone want a relationship if they don't. She gave you a very clear message "I don't want a serious relationship." You are second guessing that 'we went to the beach, she must want a serious relationship after all.' People who do fwb actually do the "friend" part of the equation too. Just because she likes hanging with you - and - likes the benefits, does not mean that she wants to be in a committed relationship with you. Just because you really click and have a sexual attraction - does not mean that she wants a serious relationship with you.

    Some people just don't do serious relationships. Some people don't do serious relationships at different times in their life (I only dated casually for awhile after I got divorced). Some women only want serious relationships with men. There are lots of reasons for this, from family pressure, to wanting kids (and not having to deal with IVF or adoption). But if someone doesn't want a serious relationship, or doesn't want it with a woman - you can't change their mind.

    She doesn't want a relationship. You don't want fwb.

    The only thing that you can do, is set limits for yourself. If she brings up strap ons, you just say "look, I am not into having casual sex with you anymore, please respect that." Yes, it takes self control. If she doesn't get the hint and start respecting your boundaries, then she isn't really great partner material.
    Frazier likes this.
  3. Spygirl

    Spygirl Well-Known Member

    Jul 2, 2013
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    Without even seeing the original post -- and I can only assume it was deleted because the poster didn't like what @Bluenote had to say....

    My initial response is....Tinder. Enough said. You met on a casual hookup site. That's the poster's first problem. People don't look for relationships on Tinder.
    Last edited: Oct 16, 2015
    Bluenote likes this.

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