On-line dating: advices for a "new one"

Discussion in 'Advice on Meeting Women' started by Lady Godiva, Apr 26, 2016.

  1. Lady Godiva

    Lady Godiva Active Member

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    Hi there everyone!

    today I decided to delight you with the following thread: What about on-line dating website for "new" members of the L-community?

    Someone who knows me, already said something about this, but I'd like to hear the opinion of the community :D

    In other words: would you recommend such instruments to confused people in need to define their not yet defined coming out? :rolleyes:

    Among straights on-line dating mostly refers to/ offers: losers, profiteers, divorced or perverts hunting just for a one-night-stand.. So, you can understand my doubts..
     
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  2. Spygirl

    Spygirl Well-Known Member

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    Online dating sites are only as good (or honest) as the people involved. I don't see anything wrong with them -- as I've had success in my personal life with those....but again, it all depends on the people involved. Sites like Tinder were designed for hooking up, so I'm constantly amazed when people get disappointed over not finding relationships in those places. Moreover, I am absolutely certain there are online sites that are havens for the "losers, profiteers, divorced people or perverts." However, I'm also thinking that there are people out there....walking in your same shoes...with no clue about how to meet other like-minded, similarly situated good individuals.

    The key, I think (and take this for what it's worth because I'm no authority on online dating or even dating in general) is to have realistic expectations and to know your limits. If you're looking for a casual relationship, make sure you define your boundaries. Like anything, open communication is truly important. If you're just looking for fun, friendship, or a relationship, then be clear about your intentions going into the situation so that anyone else knows where you stand and what to expect from you. At the same time, online voyeurism doesn't give a person the right to know everything about you -- all true relationships/friendships should begin with a modicum of trust. Expect that there are liars or people who aren't who or what they say they are. So, take your time, be selective, and only share details about you which people have earned the right to know.

    Going into an online dating situation with a healthy dose of realism may have you finding yourself pleasantly surprised if you meet someone wonderful without being disappointed if you don't.
     
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  3. Lady Godiva

    Lady Godiva Active Member

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    Thanks Spygirl!
     
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  4. Emm

    Emm Well-Known Member

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    Online dating is essentially the same as any type of dating...it has its attractions and its drawbacks.
    Yes there are the creepers and the weirdos but there's also the cool people you can get to know, even just as friends.

    Usually you can specify a lot of things to narrow it down, age range, sexual preferences, lifestyle choices, height/weight/distance ranges. You may not get as many matches but you don't end up getting messaged by the weirdly overtly sexual woman 200 miles away who has zero chill, or the married couples looking for a third person.

    Approach it the same as you would any dating scene, just like venues and bars every site caters to different groups, play around with it til you find one that works for you
     
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  5. Belevet

    Belevet Member

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    I am totally fed up with so called self-proclaimed great dating sites . My experience of them is in general = total dismay, i've lost faith in this genre !!! Can someone, somewhere organise a room full of anti dating site women, to get together and see each other in the flesh, praise the lawrd!! Thanks x
     
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  6. JuneCarter

    JuneCarter Member

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    Exactly my thoughts!!!
     
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  7. AWhiskeyThing

    AWhiskeyThing Member

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    Honestly I like online dating, it's how I met my wife. It lets you broaden your horizons outside of your usual social circle and meet people you otherwise wouldn't have. There's always going to be liars, but between reading the profiles and exchanging conversations with them first, you can get an idea of someone. Big thing to remember is ignore those who only message about your pictures. If they start a conversion about something random on your page, you can tell that they're actually interested in getting to know you (hint - when starting a conversation with a girl, bring up something random halfway down her bio)
     
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  8. Margaritasamani

    Margaritasamani New Member

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    Anyone knows where to go out in New Mexico Albuquerque.
     
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  9. alien30

    alien30 Member

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    Lady Godiva, to avoid repeating I just gave answer on similar question in this thread https://forums.afterellen.com/threads/where-are-all-the-butches.7997/#post-81897

    Point is that there is so much single potential partners out there so it is impossible that anybody can't find something...
     
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