Just wanted to update anyone reading this post. I found so courage and some confidence in my heart and told my parents that I am not going to Pakistan this year. Didnt give them the real reason tho. I want to wait before I make any big decisions. It took many fight and much pervasive efforts to finally have them agree. So right now I am neither engaged nor married nor in any days in a relationship with a man. Not that I want to be. I realized if I don't fight than I am giving up. I don't want to look back later in life and say I gave up. That's not me. I have slowly came out to more friends. Even my closest family member, my younger cousin. Everyday I'm going to fight. I might lose my family and I might be hurt for some time but I want to be myself not someone's image of the perfect person. I will keep on updating as I make progress. Wish me luck.